Take a Step

At church this morning, I sat through a sermon that didn't bring me closer to God but did serve as an inspirational and motivational message to the procrastinator within. The pastor discussed Matthew 14:22 which pertains to Peter walking on water on the insistence of one water walking Jesus. The message was titled: Step out of your Boat. It was part of the Take a Step series which will be the message for the month of January.

My particular boat is procrastination. I've been really slacking on those b-school apps. I've been skipping interviews which I should be grateful come my way. I've been sleeping till noon even on days I get to bed by midnight.

I've been focusing on a relationship that is not a relationship at all; merely a distraction from my search for the real deal. Perhaps an act of self-sabotage, perhaps a fear of committment, perhaps even a misguided attempt to prove to myself that a selfish man CAN love a selfish woman. I've tried that before...it doesn't work--I've learned that lesson.

I usually hate sermons. It's why I love Catholic Church, most of the time is spent on rituals that focus on repetition rather than a message. But this morning, sitting in that pew betweem my mom and her new husband I realized we never fully shake the yoke of faith instilled within us as children.

When all was said and I done, I believed because I was taught to believe. I listened as I was taught to listen. I will live as I was taught to live, despite the length of hiatus I take from that path--it is my path and I will tread upon it.