August 14, 2008

No Cure for Loneliness

Sometimes I cry and there are so many reasons why I don't know which of them is responsible for these set of tears. Other times I lay still and hold my breath--hold it till it hurts--hold it till it burns. Not every day, not even every other day, but the days that I don't smile I'm not sure if I ever will again.

Inside me there is an emptiness, a loneliness, one that is unfilled even in the happiest of times. One that cripples me on days I miss living. The sun shines and the mooon rises but I stay unmoved--unchanged by the course of time past. How many days and months I've lost this way, I've lost count. There was a time I knew. There was an odometer for my solitude but it broke along the way. It melted away with my spirit; my ability to fulfill any given day's true potential.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Please come spend some time with us. I have faith that the emptiness can be filled.

Love,
Spring

Anonymous said...

'Only child' syndrome, ultimately at the root of these feelings, I suspect. It's tough being the only offspring in a family.

Lots of pressure. Weight pressing down, over time, can warp you.

:(

I'm sad to see ya blue, kiddo.