Birthday Badness

Ditha, my sweet roomie, threw a heck of a party last night...in honor of my 25 years on this fine planet. The question remains...when will I return to my home planet?

I had been contemplating going down to DC to see V, since I always spend my birthdays with him, but the truth is what I always do is run to him when things are going wrong in my life. He fixes it or puts it in a palatable perspective. I return to my life. I thought 25 was a good age to break that pattern. So I didn't go.

The day started with a walk of shame home. Phone calls. Texts. E-mails. E-cards. Mailed cards. Taurean taking me to a delicious sushi buffet at Minado, where I stuffed myself to the point of wishing elastic waistbands on all. We ambled through midtown so he could get back to Rezif and I could hop the 6 at GC.

In the evening, Ditha invited two of my favorite girls out for some drinks in Union Square: Special K and The Redhead. We did shot after shot after shot. Though I recognized this as a ruse to inebriate me sufficiently so I may be adequately surprised when I got back to our apartment where a barrage of boys had ice-cream cake with a big 19 in lit, trick candles burning.

We kept shooting and eating cake through the night. The Redhead showed us wedding photos of since she and her husband had just gotten back from their elopement to Vermont. and Special K told us tall tales of men who were hung like squirrels. It was the ideal balance of women for a 25th coming of age. Ditha proceeded to miss her boy and booty call him at 1am, but the VP was asleep or so we presumed till her called back at 2am. The infeasibility of him transporting himself in from NJ, reaffirmed to me the challenges of geographic undesirability. This is why I'm a Manhattan snob--no excuses for not coming over if you reside on this isle.

Tommy and Jaylin got an eyeful. We traded them girl-on-girl action (ok, it was just some innocent making out) for shots of whiskey. They had some significant catching up to do. Since it was my birthday, I was the chosen maker-outer. The Redhead was happy to oblige sans shots, but Ditha took a staunch stand and poured shot after shot. Those poor boys didn't know what hit them, they tried to negotiate but she's a tough cookie. Special K was next and she put some real tongue into it. Girls lips really are a LOT softer and taste nothing like chicken.

To top the last event, it was decided that I should be the getter and judge of lap dances. The boys tried really hard but they couldn't compete with the girls, especially the Redhead. She's OBVIOUSLY done this sort of sexy dance for the husband before (ok, maybe 8 others too). It was some serious lap action and I didn't have to put $ bills in anyone's pants/skirts.

I had the lowest expectations for this birthday and it might have been one of the best ones yet. I missed many of my friends. So some shout outs are in order.

Chi and Karate--thanks for the cards.
Li and Gordon--you're the best...thanks for your calls.
Sheila and Trace--Thanks for the texts and mad love.
Rani, Anand, and Eli--I can't believe you kids remembered. Sweet!
V--That was a serious b'day package...the autographed Stephen King poster--you KNOW me.

Well...there will be much more on the birthday frontier once Li gets here this weekend. Crazy party planning noodle--I can't wait. It's been a helluva start though.

Lovin' life at 25...dreams come alive at 25!