December 8, 2005

Sim Seema

I never thought I'd join a sorority. Even during Rush, the recruitment process, I was sure I was not going to join. Not me, said I...Not me!

But during orientation when all the sororities did their annual dorm storm, Seema stopped by my room. She introduced herself and explained that she as just stopping in to say hi to the frosh as part of an Alpha welcome. I was in love. She was the most beautiful Indian girl I had ever seen. Her skin was dark and rich. Her raven hair, straight, shiny and almost indigo in hue. Her smile radiant. She was in the super competitive IR program. Her ideas on everything from abortion to civil liberties was fascinating. I could listen to her articulate herself all day. She was quick to ask me my thoughts on issues outside the cafeteria and week 1 on campus. Apparently she was from a homogenously white high school in upstate NY--we understood one another perfectly. She explained how Team India had recruited her at JHU but she'd turned it down for the Alpha Life...as the only Indian girl in the chapter, they had elected her president. I was mesmerized.

She gave me the personalized last talk during Rush. I knew going into bid day that they would make me an offer and I would not refuse it. When time came for my pledge class to run for elections there was much strife--just as there is every year. I was far from the obvious choice...having little leadership experience and an academic record tarnished by a sememster "off-campus"--yeah, ac pro was me. Having a stellar school record was pivotal to winning the election. All semesters following the election I crawled my way onto the tail end of Dean's List, but I was never a good student--forever placing value on my interpersonal relationships. No regrets.

Seema had graduated by then, but she came in to see me just before nominations. She asked if I would run. Her voice still carried much say--with more than just me,I would guess--so with my confidence thus bolstered and V's encouragement, I ran. Suffice to say, I won. It remains one of the better decisions of my life. I learned much about myself and many of those skills have made the difference in my corporate life. It really does not surprise me that so many US Presidents and CEOs were in fraternities.

Carrie (my big) was stepping down and she went to bat for me. She supported me through the tough times that followed--guiding me, only offering solicited advice, and often taking steps back to let me step into the position. They were some rough patches, but Carrie and V were my pillars--without them, I shudder to think what I would have done. What followed in the wake of my electoral success was that my little and then her little succeeded me. A bit of a dynasty had been created.

All this comes back to me now because Seema has been in town interviewing. After college, she got her MA, moved in with her Greek boyfriend, did a two-year stint in Bangalore, been featured in half a dozen society pages in Bangalore, ended things with her almost fiancee to date the exact guy her parents WOULD have picked out for her--from their specific community, but didn't have to. She's going to break into banking and do the NYC thing. She's human to me now. The goddess status I ascribed to her in college has been replaced by an immense respect. In a way taking her off that pedestal has humanized her. I see that just like me, she lives it one day at a time, taking the good with the bad life deals. It gives me hope for myself.

When I needed a role model she was there for me. Now I need a friend, and here she is for me. Though, secretly, if I could still grow up and be anyone...it'd be you, Seemz.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

me too! me too!

tho you gotta wonder about the ones who DIDN'T want to be like her.