Return of Jaylin

Jaylin and I ended up IMing last night--after months of not talking. We're having dinner next week--maybe.

It's a strange coincidence. I was just thinking to myself that I had NO ONE to drunk dial tonight in my St. Patty's celebratory stupor. V and I aren't speaking. I am no longer interested in any contact with the last boyfriend. Sk8ter boi and I left it on rocky terms--he wasn't too thrilled at my miniscule attention span and general flaking on tentative plans.

This is the first time in my post-pubertal life that I'm lacking in the crush department. Not a boy of interest for MILES. I've heard women call this feeling empowerment. I've heard women complain of loneliness. It's not that I'm ambivalent, I guess nonchalance is my state. I'm not sure what to make of it. It's been this way for a few months now and I can't say I mind it terribly but I can't say I can envision this going on indefinitely either. I guess, just with getting over a break-up (it takes time), I wish I knew how long this would last too.

I feel ready to start something up again. Nothing too serious, but I've never been one to keep it at the requisite level of casual either--so what is there for the middle ground, even-keeled girl with a dash of crazy?

I'm not a commitphobe per se, but I wouldn't describe myself as the woman who seeks it out. It's about monogamy to me and I learned the hard way that monogamy and committment are not synonyms! Jo calls it a MSP (monogamous sex partner)--I'd like to take it a step farther, make it personal a la 50-cent "Before I be your buddy in bed, let me be your best friend!"