August 21, 2008
August 14, 2008
No Cure for Loneliness
Sometimes I cry and there are so many reasons why I don't know which of them is responsible for these set of tears. Other times I lay still and hold my breath--hold it till it hurts--hold it till it burns. Not every day, not even every other day, but the days that I don't smile I'm not sure if I ever will again.
Inside me there is an emptiness, a loneliness, one that is unfilled even in the happiest of times. One that cripples me on days I miss living. The sun shines and the mooon rises but I stay unmoved--unchanged by the course of time past. How many days and months I've lost this way, I've lost count. There was a time I knew. There was an odometer for my solitude but it broke along the way. It melted away with my spirit; my ability to fulfill any given day's true potential.
Inside me there is an emptiness, a loneliness, one that is unfilled even in the happiest of times. One that cripples me on days I miss living. The sun shines and the mooon rises but I stay unmoved--unchanged by the course of time past. How many days and months I've lost this way, I've lost count. There was a time I knew. There was an odometer for my solitude but it broke along the way. It melted away with my spirit; my ability to fulfill any given day's true potential.
Over and Over Again
Fresh gashes on my Heart
Every day we're Apart
Why do you Vilify?
Each tear from my Eye.
Remember--
when life was measured in "Always!"
The hours of Humidity
Entangled in Ecstacy
Above loss and Apathy
Refrain, please, Remain
Some more on love's Train
Every day we're Apart
Why do you Vilify?
Each tear from my Eye.
Remember--
when life was measured in "Always!"
The hours of Humidity
Entangled in Ecstacy
Above loss and Apathy
Refrain, please, Remain
Some more on love's Train
August 9, 2008
Koala Vegas & Luckey Cushion
Vegas, The Koala Puppy, perched on a tree while I smile and shake my head--near E. 98th Street in Central Park. Photo courtesy of Zayan on my camera phone.
Luckey managed to sandwich himself in between all the cushions at my Mom's house to maximize his comfort while the rest of us watched TV.
August 8, 2008
New York Magazine Website--SWEET
Luckey and I have made it as big as we possibly can.
Checks us out on the New York Magazine website!
Guess Getty Images is a bit hit in the internet image community.
Checks us out on the New York Magazine website!
Guess Getty Images is a bit hit in the internet image community.
August 6, 2008
Moo Mobile
Saturday, August 2, 2008
Li, CLui, Tommy, Stu, and I hit up the Sunburnt Cow on Ave. C for brunch. The line was insane so the guy sent us over to Bondi Road on Rivington on the Moo Mobile.
I wish I had a photo of the inside of this Scooby Doo-esque mode of transport. Take my word for the plush, velvet, polka dotted blue/push-pin seats in the spacious van circa 1972.
Li, CLui, Tommy, Stu, and I hit up the Sunburnt Cow on Ave. C for brunch. The line was insane so the guy sent us over to Bondi Road on Rivington on the Moo Mobile.
I wish I had a photo of the inside of this Scooby Doo-esque mode of transport. Take my word for the plush, velvet, polka dotted blue/push-pin seats in the spacious van circa 1972.
3 Little Pigs
I saw these three little peeking into one of the random boutiques on Little West 12th Street on Thursday last week when Li Chen was in town. We went to Brass Monkey, Revel, The Little Inn, and Garden of Ono on a MePa bar crawl I set up.
Park-ing
Tonight, I went to the Conservatory Garden with Zayan and my dogs. It was his first time there. It was his first time meeting Vegas. It was his first time in my apartment. It was my first time in Central Park after nightfall.
I met him at Best Cellars at 6:15pm. We tasted some wine--purchased a bottle of blush and a bottle of pinot grigio--before moving up to Gourmet Garage. I picked up Salute and Pepper-crusted goat cheese as well as an assortment of olives (for him) with Genoa Salame and Proscuitto to go with a fresh baguette. A bar of Belgian milk chocolate for dessert while he watched the dogs.
We walked over to the garden where we unwrapped food and drink beneath the luxurious Italian wisteria of the middle garden. We started with the blush while the dogs ran and barked below us. We saw a raccoon emerge and climb up the ivy covered trellis. We talked about nothing and everything. We ate cheese, meat, and bread while extolling the European way of life.
The fountain shut itself off at 7:45pm when the park guard announced the place was closing down--after all sunset was at 8:05pm. Then we moseyed over to the field at E. 102nd St...laid out the blanket I'd brought along and popped open the white wine as we unwrapped what was left of the feast. We talked about getting older. We talked about the future. Loving New York and leaving New York. Believing in each other and believing in tomorrow. Missing yesterday and knowing it was today. We sat there till well after dark. Many owners with unleashed dogs went by--mine socialized with some of them. We sat. We lay. We were.
It was a good night...beneath the watchful eye of Mt. Sinai. It was very New York with an ex.
I met him at Best Cellars at 6:15pm. We tasted some wine--purchased a bottle of blush and a bottle of pinot grigio--before moving up to Gourmet Garage. I picked up Salute and Pepper-crusted goat cheese as well as an assortment of olives (for him) with Genoa Salame and Proscuitto to go with a fresh baguette. A bar of Belgian milk chocolate for dessert while he watched the dogs.
We walked over to the garden where we unwrapped food and drink beneath the luxurious Italian wisteria of the middle garden. We started with the blush while the dogs ran and barked below us. We saw a raccoon emerge and climb up the ivy covered trellis. We talked about nothing and everything. We ate cheese, meat, and bread while extolling the European way of life.
The fountain shut itself off at 7:45pm when the park guard announced the place was closing down--after all sunset was at 8:05pm. Then we moseyed over to the field at E. 102nd St...laid out the blanket I'd brought along and popped open the white wine as we unwrapped what was left of the feast. We talked about getting older. We talked about the future. Loving New York and leaving New York. Believing in each other and believing in tomorrow. Missing yesterday and knowing it was today. We sat there till well after dark. Many owners with unleashed dogs went by--mine socialized with some of them. We sat. We lay. We were.
It was a good night...beneath the watchful eye of Mt. Sinai. It was very New York with an ex.
Houdini
D'Souza and I have long joked that Vegas is Houdini reincarnated as a fluffy whie pup. This has never been more true than yesterday.
Luckey and I went downtown to check out The Falls--whilst a nice guy from Getty Images photographed us going about our "Staycation".
D recently installed an AC in my apartment but instead of investing in actual unit siding from Home Depot we opted for a piece of flimsy folder and scotch tape to close the big gap left by the relative shortness of the AC to the width of the window.
I thought nothing of any of this as Luckey and I jauntily set off at noon yesterday. We had a fine time and even picked up some 5 for $1 dumplings from Chinatown as we returned Uptown. As I turned the bend on 102 Street, I heard high-pitched barking which sounded a lot like Vegas but I dimissed as just another pup on the premises. Lo and behold, as I ambled down the block the barking grew louder and I looked into my small courtyard to see my small dog sitting beside the black gate scratching the front door to my apartment and barking his little puppy head off.
Alarmed, I rushed down the few black steps leading to the gate unlocked it and plucked him up off the ground--shaken by the thought that he could easily have been stolen for parts if not the whole. YIKES! He could have been taken just to silence the irksome barks. How long had he been sitting out there?
I couldn't believe he jumped from my bed onto the window sill and clawed his way out through the folder then dropped 2.5 feet through the black bars on my window into the filthy courtyard. My neighborhood is not known for its cleanliness or respect for public/private property--people routinely throw stuff down into my diminutive outdoor space. Sigh.
Luckey would never have done any such thing had I left him home alone. Now I'm petrified to leave Vegas unattended--what if he embarks on anothe stunt like this but isn't so lucky. Crazy animal.
Luckey and I went downtown to check out The Falls--whilst a nice guy from Getty Images photographed us going about our "Staycation".
D recently installed an AC in my apartment but instead of investing in actual unit siding from Home Depot we opted for a piece of flimsy folder and scotch tape to close the big gap left by the relative shortness of the AC to the width of the window.
I thought nothing of any of this as Luckey and I jauntily set off at noon yesterday. We had a fine time and even picked up some 5 for $1 dumplings from Chinatown as we returned Uptown. As I turned the bend on 102 Street, I heard high-pitched barking which sounded a lot like Vegas but I dimissed as just another pup on the premises. Lo and behold, as I ambled down the block the barking grew louder and I looked into my small courtyard to see my small dog sitting beside the black gate scratching the front door to my apartment and barking his little puppy head off.
Alarmed, I rushed down the few black steps leading to the gate unlocked it and plucked him up off the ground--shaken by the thought that he could easily have been stolen for parts if not the whole. YIKES! He could have been taken just to silence the irksome barks. How long had he been sitting out there?
I couldn't believe he jumped from my bed onto the window sill and clawed his way out through the folder then dropped 2.5 feet through the black bars on my window into the filthy courtyard. My neighborhood is not known for its cleanliness or respect for public/private property--people routinely throw stuff down into my diminutive outdoor space. Sigh.
Luckey would never have done any such thing had I left him home alone. Now I'm petrified to leave Vegas unattended--what if he embarks on anothe stunt like this but isn't so lucky. Crazy animal.
Bryant Park HBO Movie Festival
Every year I look forward to summer in New York primarily because Monday nights shift from tea to Bryant Park for the HBO Movie Festival.
This year I have not been to a single film--a sympton of my romance with Manhattan trickling down to nothing. I'm that suitor who has sidled past courtship into the comfortable but boring role of live-in lover...I take without giving, indulge without appreciating, and generally survive where I was once thriving.
What happened? How did we get here? My main Man has lot his luster...really, I'm the one that changed. Swear as I did I couldn't possibly get over this mega-metropolis I think that's just what happened this summer. The slow faling out of love has become a firmly out of love status.
What city can possibly measure up to NYC? Where do I go from here?
______________________________________________________________________
In an effort to reconcile I've e-mailed the tea girls--we will be catching The Candidate starring Robert Redford in Bryant Park next Monday (8/11)--I'll be raising my plastic cup full of white wine to the city while I get very sleepy.
This year I have not been to a single film--a sympton of my romance with Manhattan trickling down to nothing. I'm that suitor who has sidled past courtship into the comfortable but boring role of live-in lover...I take without giving, indulge without appreciating, and generally survive where I was once thriving.
What happened? How did we get here? My main Man has lot his luster...really, I'm the one that changed. Swear as I did I couldn't possibly get over this mega-metropolis I think that's just what happened this summer. The slow faling out of love has become a firmly out of love status.
What city can possibly measure up to NYC? Where do I go from here?
______________________________________________________________________
In an effort to reconcile I've e-mailed the tea girls--we will be catching The Candidate starring Robert Redford in Bryant Park next Monday (8/11)--I'll be raising my plastic cup full of white wine to the city while I get very sleepy.
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